Saturday, September 15, 2007

A Night at the Movies

Two evenings of birthday screaming.

E had her real birthday on Thursday, with a small family gathering, then a party with 47 children on Friday. Mr Neebes and the Sisterwife dealt with the Friday issue at the local park, while I played sick... upon their return, however, Sisterwife and I made a mad dash for the door, leaving Mr Neebes to deal with the four Neebes children while we drove to catch the 8.20 showing of the new Jody Foster film, The Brave One.

We left in real single woman fashion, top down, feeling free, sister, free!

Upon our arrival at the Church of Cinema Eight, we discovered the paper was wrong, and the actual showtime was at 7.50.... the only film we could catch was Dragon War.... something the ticket girl said was "....better than Transformers."

We believed her.

Have any land in Florida you want us to buy?

Purchasing our BigButtBucket, we settled into the SweetSpot O'Seats, just behind the rail, where you can put your feet up, and watched the previews, marking the ones we wanted to see, the one with Joaquim, and something else that passed us by, drool still in our mouths from Joaquim.

The film started.

It was so bad, we couldn't even make fun of it... not a single portion of it... nothing. Not even the sub-titles were good, even though they were taking place in China in 1508, yet were full of modern colloquialisms. We couldn't even laugh at the fact they inserted parts of an old film called Dinotopia... there was slashing and slaying and squishing and no blood.

It.
Sucked.
Rocks.

We finally looked at each other, stood up and left, holding our still full BigButtBucket....and headed for the manager.

She was all of 17.

"Look, that movie sucked," I said, smiling. "We aren't staying, but, are willing to come back to the next showing of Jodie's film, which was our first choice."

"We don't do refunds."

One ticket seller spoke up, "These two women support us, they come here so much." Another chimed in, "Yeah, they know our prices better than we do, and the dark haired one, she is the one who named the BigButtSpecial."

"You mean, she's....?"

"Yes."

I looked into the office, and saw our photos, with little candles under them. It was a cute shrine.

They marked our tickets, and we left, hearing the whispered voices behind us, knowing we'd made a few people's day.

Wandering around WalMart, we manged to spend time and money, waiting for the showing of The Brave One. Wait time equaled 45 minutes and $39.23 between us.

They re-filled our bucket and drinks, we again found the SweetSpot O'Seats, and sat though the Foster film.

Photos, btw, can be seen at the Sisterwife's site.... she's far more creative than I.

We didn't talk during Jodie's performance.... except to wonder if she had a body double for the love scenes....okay, okay, I wondered. It was a good film, we ate our poporn, drank our drinks and she consumed the M&M's.... unless I wanted to kiss, I was denied chocolate.

Our only regret?

We have no idea how Dragon War ended....so, if any of you know, drop me a line.

2 comments:

golfwidow said...

A comet came.

Oh, no, that's dinosaurs, not dragons. Never mind.

Quin said...

DAMN you, for a minute...i believed.